My Take on Marriage & Why I’m not Taking it!

Late twenties is the most difficult stage for an ambitious adult, who doesn’t want to get tied down, follow his passions, and live a life on his own.

It is the time one struggles more in his career. Things get worse if he is an entrepreneur and trying to create a career on his own. Mostly, it will be the time he is getting hit by failures and setbacks. He may be trying hard to learn and rise. It is during this period he learns number of hard truths about life. Everything in life takes time.

Billions of thoughts will be racing inside his mind. His heart will be oscillating between positivity and negativity. Struggles, hardships and confusions everywhere. It is during this period, life tests him in all ways it can, with no mercy.

In the midst of all those chaos (and if you are ‘lucky’ to be born in India), an aunt or uncle appears from nowhere and whispers in your ears : “Son, when are you going to get married?” (Are you telling me to move from chaos to a horrible disaster?!)

Duh! That whispering feels like a bug in your ear or a hammer hit on your head.

“Look son, your cousin got married and he got two kids now!” (wow! But, I’m not my cousin!) “When I was of your age, I got 4 kids” (No wonder my country raced passed one billion mark,sadly, in terms of population) “Who will take care of you if you fall sick?” (For what on earth; hospitals, nursing centres and old age homes are built for?) “If you get married, you will find a meaning in life” (As if I don’t find any meaning in life right now.) “You are reaching 30 and you will find it difficult to get a good alliance if you delay it further.” (Do I look like a man who cares) “Getting married makes you responsible and happy!” (I always take responsibility for all troubles I make! You know, I’m happy and I’m stupid too!)

There are thousands of stupid reasons to get married. There are few wise reasons for not getting married as well.

During this period of my life, I have witnessed most of my friends got married. Unfortunately (or, fortunately), few of them got divorced by not even waiting to celebrate their first wedding anniversary.

I have seen successful marriages, but there are only very few. Some marriage relationships are surviving on big compromises made either by husband or wife. Others are struggling to make the ends meet.

Failed marriages have some factors in common. They have either married for sex or under family pressure.

Have you ever noticed that most of your friends or relatives find love and get married almost at same time. Do you think Cupid has a mysterious way of hitting everyone at same time? No. Is there any age limit for finding love? Absolutely not. People get married because most of his/ her friends are getting married. It is not a valid reason for marriage.

With the advent of social media, marriages have become an online celebration and also an online competition. Who gets the best marriage? Who gets the best honeymoon destination? Who gets a rich husband? Who gets a beautiful wife? Moreover, who don’t like the idea of being a winner?

People do get married because they simply like the idea of marriage and admire every wedding gown they see.

In my country, dowry system has made numerous marriages some sort of business deals. May be, cheap business deals. Some marriages has become an easy way to get someone to support them financially. Being lonely makes some people try a hand at marriage too. If you are not happy with yourself, no one can help you out. No one can make you happy if you are not happy inside. Being happy is an individual choice and responsibility.

For people who fear of getting old and die a miserable death if they don’t get married and have kids; let me be brutally honest to you here: being old is going to suck. It will suck more if you are bedridden or start depending on others for your survival. Even if you are blessed with kids, grandkids or not, doesn’t matter… because they will be busy with their own life at that point of time.

It is always very difficult to accept reality.

A wise man never marry for the sake of getting married. So do I. Till the day I find true love and a best friend for a lifetime, whom I love sharing my life with, I’m not going to get married. And I believe, it is the cutest decision I have ever taken in my life.

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